If the art of being wise was what to overlook...

As I mentioned in my "reflections from heart and mind" blog, our choices make who we are or who we want to be. The post sets where I am approaching the topic from.

My aim is to open a discussion or may be more to point out the relationship between overlooking and tolerating. We know overlooking is essential for our sanity, mental hygiene or even survival at certain circumstances.

What do you overlook or what do you tolerate even they are not exactly what you want to see in your life at that point in time?
Can overlooking be a mild form of denial in disguise or sort of rationalization for our choice?

Would you agree that true friends are the ones who overlook our failures and tolerate our success?

Regards,
Mehmet Yildiz

Lucas Wyrsch

lucas_wyrsch

If the art of being wise was what to overlook...

Dear Mehmet, Thank you for your great blog. I like Doug Larsen's quote: "A true friend is one who overlooks your failures and tolerates your success." I think that what is hard to endure is sweet to remember. We all tend to overlook or to repress what we don't want to be remembered for whatsoever reason. I think that repression or overlooking is an involuntary psychological act of excluding desires and impulses like wishes, fantasies or feelings from one's consciousness and holding or subduing them in the unconscious. Repression or overlooking may be considered as a defense mechanism of our frivolity, our lack of seriousness, perhaps even of our mental laziness. It's a bit like if we would tell somebody that we "haven't time" event though, we always have time! Have a great and successful time! Best - Lucas Join The Swiss Business Club - Join the GuanXi Game Club - Join the Risk Consulting Club - And Join Doing Business Virtually!

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Solveigh Calderin

solveighcalderin-332372

If the art of being wise was what to overlook...

My aim is to open a discussion or may be more to point out the relationship between overlooking and tolerating. We know overlooking is essential for our sanity, mental hygiene or even survival at certain circumstances. It is actually a very small difference between overlooking and tolerating, Mehmet... It is possible that I can overlook things, which I normally can not live with..., just because the person is not very close with me... Tolerating for me means accepting. I can tolerate each kind of being other than me. But that does not mean, that I support and sanction all in the world... There comes the mental hygiene into the play: I do not include everything and everyone into my life. Sometimes it is needed to overlook somethings because (as you are writing very well), it can be important for my survival to overlook them. But also here I see some borders, which I can not cross without loosing and/or reveal myself. What do you overlook or what do you tolerate even they are not exactly what you want to see in your life at that point in time? Can overlooking be a mild form of denial in disguise or sort of rationalization for our choice? I think, it is not good to have very fix images of whom I allow to become a part of my life. Of course, there are some things, which I never can overlook or tolerate as a part of my life. The characteristics of a person I can find out only, when I take the time to get to know the other. Without that, all what my meaning may be is a prejudice and that is always not, what the other actually is. The way to absolutely tolerance of each other is a long one and goes not only through a long time, but through a lot of crisis, joys, problems, funs, what means a long way of life, till is possible, what Kutay meant: Friendship does not need words and his picture shows the possible diversity of friends, who complement each other. Would you agree that true friends are the ones who overlook our failures and tolerate our success? I would even procceed a step: A friend sees me as am I - and does not try to change me - is that overlooking or tolerating? A friend helps me to find the best of myself and to develop that. A friend leads me to success, will help me to come to success. All has to be seen in reciprocity, what I expect from the other, I give to the other as well... It is a never ending process of development. As far as all involved persons develop in the same way of respecting each other, the friendship will be very procreative. Solveigh Calderin Hereke Carpets - Tradition, Beauty, Luxury and Elegance Follow me on Twitter Find my personal profile and business site on Facebook Google Buzz me Superfan

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Gordon Wheaton

gordonwheaton-294525

If the art of being wise was what to overlook...

Most certainly Mehmet. Friends do overlook failure and tolerate success. In fact they even go onto applaud success in some circumstances Regards Gordon

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Nighet Nasim Riaz

nnriaz-374792

If the art of being wise was what to overlook...

I don't think we overlook the bad points in others. We acknowledge them because we know we ourselves are not perfect and cannot expect perfection in others. It is when communication between friends break down that these points swing into sharper focus. N N Riaz nnriaz@googlemail.com

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Michael Heaney

michaelheaney-53285

If the art of being wise was what to overlook...

Its selective attention... we are individually bombarded with an overload of sensory imputs. what we chose to ignore allows us to focus on what we think is important. the brain filters out the background traffic noise so we can concentrate on a philosophical conversation with a companion. sometimes we get it right and are able to perform well and grow and learn and develop sometimes we get it wrong and block out the noise of the number nine bus as it hurtles towards us. its a balance of selective attention and situational awareness... I blogged about it here Golf Lessons - No 1. Maintaining Focus http://www.ecademy.com/node.php?id=132676 Michael Heaney Benchwhistler Associates Ltd Planned People Maintenance - Enhancing the Performance of your most important asset www.benchwhistler.com Know Better

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kutay f.helvacioglu

kutay-helvacioglu-455117

If the art of being wise was what to overlook...

l mean mehmet, friends needs no words... kutay f.helvacıoğlu lycianprojects.com

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RealSteveHolmes Fading away soon

cvsage-38854

If the art of being wise was what to overlook...

Another fabulous topic, Mehmet. Thank you. No real argument with your premise. My true friends are all very tough and original people that I admire in some way. Very original and truly tough.

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Das Suman (Doctor-Da)

doctordas

If the art of being wise was what to overlook...

@ Would you agree that true friends are the ones who overlook our failures and tolerate our success? ...if 'overlooking' was a 'friendly-job' then H:)W they could really help us learning from our failures!? and the term 'celebrate' would be better (I think) than 'tolerate'! Anyways... for me, "true friends are the ones who overlook lookover our failures and tolerate celebrate our success" :) Doctor-Das, Suman ( Doctor-Da ) :) foodyoga ll riaa ll flip ll alterad ll twitter ll linked-in

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Sam Borrett

samborrett-372470

If the art of being wise was what to overlook...

Hi Mehmet, I agree that- true friends are the ones who overlook our failures and tolerate our success however if we're going astray I think it is OK if they remind us. Sam Sam Borrett Master Mentor, Entrepreneur, Facilitator Mentoring4Change Jupiter Properties Pty. Ltd. EastWest Property Investments PO Box 241 Brunswick Heads, NSW, 2483 Australia

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Andreas Wiedow

andreas_wiedow

If the art of being wise was what to overlook...

@ Would you agree that true friends are the ones who overlook our failures and tolerate our success? Yes. And more. They not only tolerate our success. They not only overlook our failures. They go far beyond. I have one friend :-)

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Tedora F. Vohs

tedora-326164

If the art of being wise was what to overlook...

@Would you agree that true friends are the ones who overlook our failures and tolerate our success? Yes, I would... without modification, we mostly overlook much easyer if a person has a special meaning in our life. It's just so, and it is humanely. We can love the world and people but just a few persons are closer to us, share our life and have more meaning for us. We also take care of and overlook by our own children much more then by other children or not? Dear Mehmet, could you please translate this wisdom words from turkey in a better english then I could.. Regards... "Hakiki Arkadaş, senin herkese gülümsemeni gören ama buna rağmen içinin ağladığını hisseden birisidir."" "Ein echter Freund ist ein Mensch der dein Lächeln nach außen sieht und trotzdem spürt, daß deine Seele weint" Your diverse, intuitive, spiritual conflict resolver.Imitationen werben immer für Originale. Blitze treffen immer die höchsten Stellen. Ein fruchtreicher Obstbaum wird am meisten gesteinigt. Deutsch- Main HP | English | Turkish | Forum für Spiritualität | Seminare in Paraguay | Tedora by yasni | Twitter | Facebook

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